Science says men are far more keen on casual sex than women. While generally women will be tempted by a one night stand only when the man in question is exceptionally attractive, men as rule just aren’t quite so picky.

As a result, men and women tend to view one night stands in drastically different ways.

Ugly Truth

According to new research, when women hook-up their motivation is mostly the ego-boost from the perceived flattery of being chosen for an overnight fling.

But they’re usually wrong. Men consciously lower their standards when prowling for one-night stand options. The assumed flattery of the gesture as such is either fantasy or else pretty close to it.

Says English Psychologist Anne Campbell: “No woman should be flattered because a man wants to have sex with her once.”

While previous research has relied on fictional stories or asking participants to imagine responses, this new study’s data is based on actual self-reports following genuine one-night stand experiences.

Women Stand to Lose More

Dr Campbell says women are not well adapted for promiscuity. They stand to lose more. For a woman, falling pregnant entails a huge responsibility, but men are free to bail whenever they like.

As a result, it’s not too surprising that women reported feeling more negatively about one-night stands than men: while 80% of men rated their overnight flings as positive experiences, for women this number was only 54%.

Comments from individual women and men are even more telling.

Women tended to report: “regret at being used”; “I felt cheap”; “horrified aftward”; “I felt degraded. Made myself look cheap and easy. Total regret.”

Whereas male descriptions of their experience were more along the lines of: “euphoric”; “excitement and lust”; “I believe on night stands are a good way to blow off steam”.

What do you think though? Is a one night stand really a risk for women and just a win-win situation for men? Or do both stand to lose or gain in similar ways?

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About the author

Jenny W
First career as newspaper and magazine journalist with daily newspapers and magazines, then as an editor who successfully launched a new national Sunday newspaper and NZ House & Garden magazine. First woman editor of NZ Listener. Enjoying a second career as a business owner and entrepreneur, health products marketer, social media habitué, blogger and web marketer. Still learning and loving it.

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